Arthur Guiterman (1871-1943)
Strictly Germ-Proof
1The Antiseptic Baby and the Prophylactic Pup
2Were playing in the garden when the Bunny gamboled up;
3They looked upon the Creature with a loathing undisguised; —
4It wasn't Disinfected and it wasn't Sterilized.
5They said it was a Microbe and a Hotbed of Disease;
6They steamed it in a vapor of a thousand-odd degrees;
7They froze it in a freezer that was cold as Banished Hope
8And washed it in permanganate with carbolated soap.
9In sulphurated hydrogen they steeped its wiggly ears;
10They trimmed its frisky whiskers with a pair of hard-boiled shears;
11They donned their rubber mittens and they took it by the hand
12And 'lected it a member of the Fumigated Band.
13There's not a Micrococcus in the garden where they play;
14They bathe in pure iodoform a dozen times a day;
15And each imbibes his rations from a Hygienic Cup --
16The Bunny and the Baby and the Prophylactic Pup.
Notes
1] Prophylactic: disease-preventing.
8] permanganate: a salt of permanganic acid. carbolated soap: a salt of carbolic acid.
13] Micrococcus: spherical bacterium, usually found on the skin of mammals.
14] iodoform: compound of iodine used as an antiseptic.
Online text copyright © 2009, Ian Lancashire (the Department of English) and the University of Toronto.
Published by the Web Development Group, Information Technology Services, University of Toronto Libraries.
Original text:
Publication date note: Guiterman, Arthur, The Laughing Muse (New York and London: Harper & Brothers Publishers, 1915): 11-12.
First published in Women's Home Companion (1906).
RPO poem editor: Ian Lancashire
RP edition:
Recent editing: 1:2004/6/21
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